Dnepropetrovsk, a new home

It struck me today that I have not truly blogged about my experience here in Ukraine. I have told small details about it and shared my thoughts that have occurred to me here, but that isn't the same. I realized on a deeper level this morning that I have a new home for the next few months. These events are important, both in the shaping of my life and the lives of those I come into contact with here.

Since will be here for several months, I suppose it's only fair to tell those of you at home a little bit about where I am staying. I am living in the great big city of Dnepropetrovsk which is home to some pretty big industrial facilities and over a million people. Interesting thing I learned is that until the collapse of the USSR, the city was closed, meaning that it was difficult to enter or leave the city without certain documents, largely due to the military factories here. There is a river running through the middle of the city named the Dnepr River. Oh, by the way, that river? Remember the factories I mentioned? Yeah... don't drink the river water...

I am currently sleeping at the church on the third floor. For those of you who are wondering, I do sleep on a mattress... sort of. As far as I have seen, a mattress like we think of in America doesn't exist here. The mattress that I have in my room is a flat sleeping pad, MAYBE an inch and a half thick. The good news is that I stole another mattress from the other bunk so now I have a solid two inches of padding! Anyway, they were nice enough to get me a desk, buy me a dresser, and I have a space heater now. I haven't needed the built in heater yet, but I a m told that it is only a matter of time.

The church is home to many things. It is actually two congregations (I don't know why) that meet in two separate sanctuaries. Below where I sleep (on the first floor) there is a small Christian primary school. Above the kitchen and dinning hall there is the Dnepropetrovsk Conference Office. Finally, around the back side of the church there is another building that houses a tiny Christian Bookstore, the pastor of one of the congregations, and the ELC.

Four days a week, I have the wonderful pleasure of eating lunch with the women from the conference office. I am able to eat a balanced meal of amazing Ukrainian food. Oh man, I don't even know how to describe all the foods, so I'll save that for another time. Suffice it to say that Ukrainians love soup, bread, and hot drinks (among many other things of course).

Razors & God

Shaving is a regular part of most peoples lives. For men it is their face, and if a woman shaves it will be her legs. Now, I have never shaved my legs, but I would imagine that it is somewhat similar to shaving your face in that dull razors just plain hurt!

When it comes to shaving and to changing the blade on my razor, I tend to wait too long. I often wait 3-5 days to shave instead of 2, leading to longer stubble. The combination of long stubble and a dull razor leads to a painful shave. Instead of changing my razor blade like I know I should, I often just force my self to "suck it up and take it like a man".

The other day I had such a shaving event. I was shaving with what might as well have been a broken dinner plate when I thought, "You know, this really hurts. I should change my razor, that would make it easier!" THEN!... I did nothing and kept shaving.

3-4 days later I was sitting in my room and I realized I needed to shave again. I grabbed my razor and shaving cream and started for the door when I remembered I needed to change the blades. That day was amazing. I shaved without pain, had not razor burn, and didn't cut myself once! Oh the differences that such a tiny change can make.

What is the best way to always look clean shaven? To shave all the time. With all of that shaving, you would need to change your razor every day! Assuming there was no financial consequence to this habit, you would become accustomed to the greater sense of comfort. I know that I would enjoy shaving more if I changed my razor every time!

I know that I am making a big deal out of a very simple thing, but I am leading into an idea, so this is where you need to start paying attention.

For the last few months, the main thing anyone seems to be talking about is LIVING with God. It isn't just because I am in Ukraine that I am hearing this. I heard it before I left and I see the idea online, too. Imagine inviting God into your life every morning. If we truly lived with God, our lives would be so much smoother at times. They would cause us less pain, not because the events are any easier, but because we have His strength in us. We must constantly change our razors, constantly dedicate ourselves to God.

I know that you should practice what you preach, but I am just a man. I am riddled with flaws and sin. I fail many days, but on the days that I dedicate myself to God, everything is better. By inviting Him to do things with me throughout the day, those things and that day are better.

Doubting Daryl

I have a person who is really close to me who is doubting religion on the whole. For the sake of pronouns, let's say they're a guy, and for the sake of a name, let's call him Daryl. Now, I was talking to Daryl about his religious views recently because he hinted that he was having doubts.

Daryl, if you read this, I want you to know that I love you and that this isn't meant to shame you or to insult you. I want you to know that this is simply me addressing the topic publicly, expressing my views to more people than just you. If you couldn't tell, when we talked I was having a hard time answering you questions. This are my views after a little bit of thinking.


So, why did I name this post "Doubting Daryl"? Well, first of all, I wanted something to make an alliteration, because they are catchy. Secondly, I didn't want to give away Daryl's real name. Thirdly, Daryl is having doubts. He is questioning reality, trying to determine what is real and what is not. These questions are very real and I had similar ones earlier in my life. It is very hard to figure out what exactly you can trust in life, or if you can even trust that you are really alive. Sometimes, when I get really sick and sleep all of the time, I have a difficult time telling what is reality and what is a dream. I tend to imagine things happening and then have to ask awkward questions afterward to see if something really happened. To the other people it is really obvious what reality is, but to me I have a hard time knowing for sure.

This is how I imagine Daryl feels right about now. He asked me something to the effect of "How do you know that religion is real and not just a way to process your emotions and the events around you?" Well, tough question. Since Emotions are subjective, and my personal interactions with God are subjective, I don't have any proof from personal experience. I do know that I have changed since coming to God, but your question is whether or not that change is really from God or if because I took a certain point of view I was able to make the changes necessary. I firmly hold that I would not have been able to make many or even all of the changes that I have if I hadn't had the help of God.

Since emotions are subjective,one will have to view that hundreds of historical proofs for the bible. I recommend researching this area even if you do believe bible because it is very interesting. If someone were to say "eh, these things aren't real" or "the bible was written after all of these things, so they don't prove it" that's fine, I have one last thing to say. It is simple and is easily illustrated with one of the questions I had a while back.

My question was this, "How do we know any of this is real? What if we are just a bunch of brains in jars, or what if I am the only one who is real, what if I am the only brain in a jar and you guys are my imagination?" Now, for those of you who don't know, there is a philosophical question about existence that was proposed a long time ago. It goes something like this. Let's say that modern science has advanced to the point of being able to remove a brain from the body without damaging or killing it. They then place it into a jar where the temperature and nutrients are kept at just the right levels to support the life of the brain. Finally, the brain is attached at all of the proper places with electrodes to allow sensory input. Some machine is then attached to the brain and the machine send the proper signals to the brain. In theory, you could convince the brain that it has a body, that is eats, sleeps, walks, and even talks, all through the use of electrical impulses. How would that brain know the difference between life in a body and life in a jar? How do you and I know that we are not simply brains in jars attached to machines? It is a scenario that can make all of life meaningless.

I came to this decision a little while before I was baptized. I don't know if life is real. I do have a choice though. I choose to believe that life is real, that is has a purpose, that I am not just some medical experiment. I choose to have faith. Faith is the only answer that transcends all questions.

You can tell me that I am just processing my emotions in a certain way, but I have to say, that view is depressing and God is waiting for you. I love you Daryl, and I am praying for you.